26 Lessons for my 26th Birthday

I’m turning 26 today, so as a treat to myself, I’ll try to write down some lessons I’ve learned so far – open to revision by future-Finn. Here we go.

1. Don’t treat yourself like an afterthought. Life’s too short to not work on learning to enjoy it.

2. Word is bond but it’s always ok to ask, once and without expectations, to revise the agreement.

3. Don’t do things because you should. Do them because you want to.

4. Courage isn’t standing up to someone when you know you’re gonna win the fight. Courage is standing up to someone for something you believe is right even when you know you might get beaten up.

5. You don’t have to stick to any one of your personalities. Reinvent yourself.

6. There is no reason you should be working 8 hours a day, it’s an arbitrary number.

7. ​​Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a Negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride. (Anthony Bourdain)

8. Never tone yourself down to accommodate someone else. Wear your quirks and peculiarities as badges of honor.

9. It’s really hard to do something useful, so never stop trying.

10. You don’t have to finish a book you started. There’s too many books to read one that doesn’t 100% captivate you.

11. What makes you happy for some time on some days, won’t make you happy on all days all the time.

12. Live less according to time. Do things when you feel like doing them, not when it’s the “right time” to do them.

13. Walk barefoot on grass more often.

14. Don’t consume any news. The important stuff will reach you.

15. It’s ok to do nothing—sometimes that’s the best thing you can do. The need to always be doing something “useful” gets in the way of uncovering your actual desires and interests.

16. You don’t need discipline to do difficult or important things. You need discipline to do things you think you should do but don’t want to do. Those are not the same things.

17. Asking a question and then shutting up and listening until the other person said what they had to say is a superpower.

18. Do more things spontaneously. What gets scheduled gets resented.

19. Have savings. Make sure you forget about them enough so you don’t think about spending them, but don’t forget about them so much that they don’t do what they’re supposed to do anymore: give you peace of mind.

20. Follow your curiosity, and don’t worry too much whether it will lead you anywhere. Trust that if you keep doing that, the thing you’re meant to do will eventually reveal itself to you.

21. There’s a difference between a crime and a mistake. And the surest way to turn a mistake into a crime is to try to cover it up. (I think I read it in a Youtube comment, can’t find the source anymore)

22. A lot of what we call “nice” is just trying to accommodate someone at the cost of speaking our truth.

23. Make this a habit: Grab a drink (a coffee, a tea, a beer, a Whisky), find a comfortable spot to sit, slowly sip your drink—and just do that. No phone, no podcast or music, not even reading. Just sitting and sipping. Maybe some people-watching. Gives you time to think, reflect, and find the beauty in everyday life.

24. Always have multiple projects you can work on at any point. Most people need a sense of progress to feel happy.

25. As hard as it may be, but nothing is worth trading your self-respect for.

26. Sometimes you won’t be happy with yourself or with your day. That’s ok, it happens. Trying to fix it will probably just make it worse. Accept your loss, call it a day, and try again tomorrow.